What is "NORMAL"?

Everyone talks about the "new normal" after you lose a child. I don't believe "normal" will ever return to my house after my 18 year old son, Max, was killed in a car crash on 8/6/10. "Normal Died With Max", and this blog is about the life I have without him.

Thursday, January 13, 2011

Christmas Eve

Originally posted as a facebook note 12/25/10 - Christmas Eve we spend with Todd's side of the family.  They were very generous this year and gave us latitude to plan and do what we could and let go what we couldn't.

We started the night by lighting a candle, signifying that Max was missing from our celebration, and we each tied a ribbon on the wreath and said something to him that we would have said to him if he were there.  We asked God to pass the messages on to him.

We went on to the traditional Spanish dinner, enchiladas, beans & rice, and chicken mole - recipes passed down from Todd's great grandmother and greatly cherished.  We all ate extra beans in honor of Max (just kidding, but that kid was the king of beans!)

We skipped the traditional church service attendance and had our own worship service.  Wesley, Malachi & Cale led the music with guitar and piano - it was the best worship music I've ever heard!  Then grandpa Gary read the Christmas story from the bible.  Mark & Todd led us in communion.  I think it was my favorite Christmas Eve service ever!

Then came the presents, and looking at Christmas lights, then ending at The Donut Whole for some coffee.  It was peaceful and we enjoyed being around our family.

We had our rough moments for sure, and the ride home was almost like a minor implosion after trying to make it through the night.  Wesley & I decided that we could SURELY find some rotten produce in our garden or fridge, and we ended the night beating the tar out of some veggies in our back yard with a baseball bat and yelling and crying how unfair it was to have Christmas without Max.  It was either find some veggies or those *%&^ Christmas ornaments were coming off the tree and we were using those!!  It was great therapy!  And probably just what we needed to get through one more day ...

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