Originally posted as a facebook note on 8/21/10 - Those who know me well know that before Max died, I was going through a very dry season with God. I had become very jaded with my friendships, being burned too many times, unwilling to trust what my heart knew was real and what wasn't. I have struggled for many months to find the closeness that I once had with God. The week of the accident, I had met with one of my girlfriends and expressed a lot of my frustration with these emotions.
And then Max died suddenly, and I was thrust into an immediate crisis. Here is where faith collides with reality - do I really believe what I believe? Or do I KNOW it to be fact? For me, there was really no question. I KNEW what I know to be true, that faith is NOT something unseen and intangible. It is REAL, it can be grasped and held on to and stood on!
I guess this is another promise fulfilled in Romans 8:28. God used this horrendous event in my life to show me to immediately drop the weight of cynicism that I had been carrying needlessly for so long. Not only is HE real, but the friends He has surrounded me with are real as well. I sat on the lawn at the church tonight and just watched the village of people that He placed me in for this season, and I was so unbelievably GRATEFUL. I love you all so much and am so completely coninviced that ours is a faith that we can trust to hold us when we have no strength left ourselves.
And then Max died suddenly, and I was thrust into an immediate crisis. Here is where faith collides with reality - do I really believe what I believe? Or do I KNOW it to be fact? For me, there was really no question. I KNEW what I know to be true, that faith is NOT something unseen and intangible. It is REAL, it can be grasped and held on to and stood on!
I guess this is another promise fulfilled in Romans 8:28. God used this horrendous event in my life to show me to immediately drop the weight of cynicism that I had been carrying needlessly for so long. Not only is HE real, but the friends He has surrounded me with are real as well. I sat on the lawn at the church tonight and just watched the village of people that He placed me in for this season, and I was so unbelievably GRATEFUL. I love you all so much and am so completely coninviced that ours is a faith that we can trust to hold us when we have no strength left ourselves.
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